R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
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