She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
