Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
Let's get the cat blown out
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
