I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Randomize
