Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
