ya dads aren't the best wingmen
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
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