you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Randomize
