It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Randomize
