i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Randomize
