I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Randomize
