Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize
