Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
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