You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
