So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
my sisters under your porch take her home
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
Randomize
