There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
