Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Randomize
