jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
