I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
