You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
Randomize
