I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
