wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
I didn't notice because vodka
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
The adults are the big ones right?
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Randomize
