love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
Randomize
