puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
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