We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Randomize
