just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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