Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
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