I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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