Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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