just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
Randomize
