I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
I woke up after 12 hours of being wildly intoxicated, got jizz on my face, and woke up in a different bed than I passed out in. My makeup is still perfect. I'm writing Revlon a thank you note.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Randomize