And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Randomize
