...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Randomize
