I'd wear matching sweaters with you
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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