he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
