so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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