I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
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