it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
