this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
