i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
Randomize
