Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
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