Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
His nipple licking is glorious
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