brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
I am one with the molecules
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
