I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
