We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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