i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
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