Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
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