Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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