I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
