Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
i think i have two assholes
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
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