friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
